Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
