There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
