My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
