cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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