Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
MIDGETS
????
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
