oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
