Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
3pm strippers are depressing
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
