i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
