I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
