I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
