i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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