He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize