Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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