I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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