Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
