quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
