I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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