I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Never underestimate the power of titties
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