When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
