I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
You can't motorboat a personality
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
We talked him into tasing himself.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Randomize
