You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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