apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
