When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
