Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just send me my own nude
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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