Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
