He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
