Umm I'm too high to move.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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