I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
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