So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
If I die, sorry about rent.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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