Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I had to cum in my sink.
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