I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
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