i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
