dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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