I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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