So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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