Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
And the cops told us we were all naked.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
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