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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.

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• (650): View more from California

  I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (562): View more from California

  New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  You just get me

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch

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