I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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