i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
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