i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
