Whats the glycemic index on semen?
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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