I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
