We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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