I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
