Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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