i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Randomize