You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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