Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
