I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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