Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
