sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
