spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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